If a trend comes into your life, even if it is loved by many, it shall fade like the handles of your Louis Vuitton (*cough cough* if it’s real). These brilliant fashion moments are like Justin Bieber’s new album: You love the songs so much you shout Again! Again! at the DJ and cannot imagine the radio would ever be capable of overplaying such a marvelous tune. But it happens to the best of us, including your closet. Here are five once-awesome trends that need to die in 2016.
Granny Hair
Your grandmother called. She wants her hair back. Face it, this trend only lasted as long as it did because beauty bloggers have the hours to spend on hair styling and Photoshop. I have yet to see a silver fox in person. Instead, I’ve noticed 19-year-old grannies sitting next to me.
“Flatform” Sandals
We get it. They’re ugly. And you chose to spend ten dollars on ugly. But I chose to spend my money at Payless to buy cheap cute. Why can’t you just buy cheap cute with me? We can grab fraps at Starbucks afterward. Maybe a sleepover? In all seriousness, the only thing these shoes are good for is making myself tall enough to ride the big coasters at the state fair.
Pointy, Chunky Nails
I’m not shutting down this trend solely because I hate the look. I’m doing this for your safety! If you have a slight itch, you must claw away at your skin just to scratch it. Don’t even get me started on trying to take out contact lenses! Besides being unpractical, these chunky nails are trashy. On social media they might be fun, but they say something else in the working world.
Matte Look & Harsh Edges
You look perfect….ly made up of product. These on point looks are amazing in pictures, but layers upon layers of makeup are so easy to spot in person. Sure, guys can be tricked into thinking a product-based look is natural, but this many coats is like smearing orange frosting mixed with edible sprinkles all over your face. It’s a mound of cake ready to slide off. Maybe a possum will mistakenly eat it off the ground tonight? In 2016, replace those intense selfies with a softer, more natural appearance. Embrace the rosiness in cheeks, the smeared on lipgloss, and the mid-laugh selfies!
Neutrals on Neutrals on Black on Neutrals
We can thank the Kardashian/Jenner clan for turning our world black and white. I’ll admit that I indulged in this trend: I wore the darker shades of lipstick, put down the neon accessories, and opted for black even with my pajamas. But the Tampa skies are now a bright blue with the sun shining gold. Kylie Jenner supports this color pop transition with her new pinky shades from her Lip Kit line. Listen to her, at least; she contours way better than I can.
Lesley Rowland is a fashion writer for AliveTampaBay.